Uniting the pieces of yourself gives you profound inner peace and removes surmounting self-doubt.

Poem: Creeps in

when things are going smooth and well

doubt begins to rapidly rise and swell

it is hard to believe this could finally be it

but trust in the process i must give

part of me desperately wants the desired outcome to be so

part of me wants to remain safe and all alone

wondering if i can ever trust another's actions or words

because i am so fucking tired of being disappointed and hurt

still in the end i know if i don't try

i will never know if this is right for my life

please protect my heart and fill me with steadfast faith

so that when worry creeps in, it doesn't seal my fate

The Hidden Power of Doubt: Why It’s Not the Enemy You Think It Is

We all experience doubt—it creeps in, whispers warnings, and convinces us that safety lies in staying small. Doubt often causes a giant divide inside. It splits our inner world into the ‘believer’ and the ‘doubter’, ‘good’ or ‘bad’ guy or ‘never will get to do that’ vs. ‘we can do anything.’ viewpoints. This can create a standstill in our life, but it doesn’t have to.

But here’s the truth: Doubt isn’t your enemy. It’s a messenger. When we learn to decode it, we unlock the confidence we’ve been searching for.

In my last post, we discussed how true confidence is born from alignment. But what happens when doubt threatens that alignment? Our brains are wired for negativity, designed to scan for threats and focus on potential failure. This can be helpful in small doses, but when doubt takes over, it divides our inner world and holds us back.

The Root Causes of Doubt

Most self-doubt stems from one of these core sources:

Fear of Failure, Judgment, or Rejection
Our primal need to belong and be accepted drives this fear. But in today’s world, we have access to new communities that will celebrate us—flaws and all. We have deep primal fears of not feeling included or part of the tribe. In prehistoric times, this literally could mean life or death, but now with almost 8 billion people on the planet, we have access to others who won’t judge us for who we are, and may in fact even desire it. They also wouldn’t be concerned if something didn’t go as planned for you, they would step in to help you or sit back and watch you try again cheering you on.

Limiting Beliefs and Negative Self-Talk
Thousands of thoughts flood our minds each day, many of them negative. Over time, these thoughts become unconscious patterns that shape how we see ourselves. If you stop and let your mind run wild for 5 minutes, I can guarantee you’ll have at least one negative or intrusive thought. For some of us, this is the context of our inner narrative and it is set to autopilot. Affirmations can work to reframe this, but NLP techniques and hypnotherapy can work even better to unveil subconscious core beliefs and rework them into desired embodied truths.

Past Experiences and Trauma
Our past leaves an imprint on our bodies and minds. These patterns create deeply ingrained neural grooves and embodied experiences, which can make doubt feel inevitable. Our brain does this instantaneously to scan for relevance and to keep us safe and secure. Over time these have caused certain neural grooves and somatic embodiment of traumatic experiences. Our entire being becomes a living and breathing past timeline forging our way through the present trying to force a better future only to come up short and frustrated.

Let’s be honest: Doubt sucks. It drains our energy, clouds our clarity, and keeps us stuck. But there’s a way through.

My Story: A Journey from Doubt to Trust

“No, no, no, no, NOOOOOO!” I screamed in that Caribou Coffee bathroom. I kept begging my best friend to tell me those pink lines weren’t on that pregnancy test stick. She tried to hold back her smile and excitement as I was crushed and crying, but there they were, as dark and as permanent could be— two pink lines that forever changed my destiny.

In all honesty, I had never wanted kids. I know this sounds harsh, but being the oldest of three with nearly 20 first cousins (my mom is one of 11 children), I was tired of taking care of everyone else. I just wanted to run free digging myself into workaholics anonymous living a regal life in a high rise of downtown Chicago. For my 21-year-old self on birth control, this did not fit into my the 10-year plan I had going. While my friend was excited for me, I was devastated. My life forever changed and my desire future shattered. On top of that, I couldn’t possibly fathom how I could be a good mom, especially so young.

There were lots of realizations in those months of gestation, and the baby wasn’t the only thing incubating. My doubts consumed me daily, especially when others would say, this will change your life! I didn’t want that! I doubted my abilities and I doubted my future would ever be good. I envisioned slaving away over a hot stove with crying babies at my hip being stripped of my mission and life’s work here in the world, not to mention my joy and hobbies gone out the window.

I had big dreams of living in a Chicago high-rise, building a career, and chasing freedom—not raising a baby. My doubts consumed me. I wasn’t ready. I couldn’t be a good mom. My future was ruined.

Mindset Shifts That Transformed My Doubt into Confidence

There were lots of realizations in those months of gestation, and the baby wasn’t the only thing incubating. My doubts consumed me daily, especially when others would say, this will change your life! I didn’t want that! I doubted my abilities and I doubted my future would ever be good. I envisioned slaving away over a hot stove with crying babies at my hip being stripped of my mission and life’s work here in the world, not to mention my joy and hobbies gone out the window.

All I knew was I was 22 and scared, consumed by doubt and fear.

What I didn’t yet know was that life would prove purposeful beyond anything I could’ve imagined.

But as my oldest grew, so did my wonder and imagination. I started to toy with ideas of “maybe this won’t be so bad.” and “this doesn’t mean I can’t have a great career” and “I could still live downtown if I want to.” Then they evolved as I could feel him begin to kick and wiggle inside me. Maybe he will bring so much joy to all of us and I wonder what his little toes will be like to even one day believe I will do my best as a mom and ask for help when I need it.

My past had caused many limiting beliefs, doubts in my own abilities and negative self-talk. I doubted in many of my abilities, except my knack for viewing myself as a failure and defective at something so important as motherhood but I was determined to find another way through and things started looking upward.

Fast forward to the first week, my oldest was home from the hospital. He was so colicky, nothing soothed him. I had no sleep, my breasts were painfully full of milk and I couldn’t take the constant crying. I was wrong, I couldn’t do this. I was a terrible mother and nothing could fix this future I didn’t want. I called my mom, and she nearly giggled when I was bawling to her.

She giggled because she had the same moment once with me and her mom. She rushed right over and helped me with him (and of course he happily complied with any of her efforts). I was relieved but felt defeated. My doubt was worse in that moment that when I saw those two distinct pink lines.

She said, “We all have moments like this. But if you lead with love and do your best with what you have, you’ll be okay.”

That advice grounded me. Slowly, I began to trust myself. I realized doubt isn’t something to conquer—it’s something to listen to and reframe.

The Key to Overcoming Doubt: Reframe and Realign

Most doubt lives in our mind. To transform it, we must train our brain to shift its focus.

Here’s how:

Identify and Reframe Negative Thoughts
When a doubtful thought arises, pause. Ask yourself:

Is this true?
What’s a more neutral or empowering perspective?
Replace the doubt with a new belief. For example, change “I can’t do this” to “I can learn how.”

Take Small Steps to Prove Yourself Wrong
Challenge your doubts. Try one small thing that scares you. Even if you don’t succeed right away, you’ve built courage and resilience in the process.

Use Embodied Affirmations
Combine affirmations with physical and emotional embodiment. For example, if your affirmation is “I am capable,” imagine what it feels like to be capable. Notice how your body responds.

A Key Exercise to Release Doubt and Build Confidence

Sometimes, the fastest way to transform doubt is to uncover the fear beneath it.

Try this:

Identify the Fear
Write down what you’re afraid of.

Name the Emotion Beneath the Fear
Is it sadness, disappointment, anger?

List What You’re Missing Out On by Avoiding the Fear
What possibilities could open if you moved through the fear?

Explore Alternative Outcomes
Ask yourself:

What if the worst doesn’t happen?
What if it turns out better than I imagined?

The Power of Inner Union: Wholeness Over Division

Doubt and fear will always exist, but they don’t have to divide you. Befriend them. Integrate them into your wholeness. Ask them what they are trying to protect you from. Get curious. There are always other alternatives to the doubts that you have. Let your mind identify the fear and then imagine the other possibilities that could happen. Greet these doubts with wonder asking, “What other neutral or positive possibilities might happen instead?” Sometimes simply giving your focus to multiple outcomes significantly decreases your doubts.

Another thing you can note is what you will develop in the process of ‘doing the thing’. In the ‘trying’ is where confidence is truly built and solidified, otherwise, it could be fleeting thoughts that doubt will devour the next time it has the potential to.

True confidence isn’t the absence of doubt—it’s the courage to move forward despite it.

When you stop seeing doubt as the enemy, you open yourself to curiosity, wonder, and new possibilities. And that’s where transformation begins.

Your Soul Already Knows the Way

You don’t need to seek answers outside of yourself. Your soul holds the blueprint. My mini-courses, archetype quiz, and Alchemy Activation Summon are designed to help you unlock it step by step.

Choose your own adventure. Trust your inner compass. You’ve got this.

Reflection Question

Where does doubt hold you back the most, and what are 10 alternative outcomes that could happen instead of the worst-case scenario?

Doubt is inevitable— being paralyzed by it isn’t. Resolve and transform the fear behind your doubt allowing your intuition and resources to help you figure it out.

With gratitude and a poem that inspires wonder as the antidote to self-doubt,

Mandi

Poem: Wonder

bring wonder back into your life

keep your curiosity lovingly alive

try new things and travel to new places

give away kindness to unknown faces

let your heart run wild into your free

to fill up the spaces love is meant to be

stir up joy and laughter when you can

to help get you through when things are bad

reconnect with the whimsy of your muse

and let her show you all you can do

your inner child inside needs your attention

so embrace her with your love and affection

choose to let your heart lead the way

and meddle with the questions of life each day

use your imagination and share your creativity freely

and gratefulness to for life you will cherish ever so deeply

a bit of magic happens when you encompass miraculous wonder

because you'll be reminded life's blessings are always growing in number

P.S.S. Have you taken the alchemy archetype quiz yet? Banish your doubts, build your courage, and pursue your destiny with a personalized quiz and PDF workbook to get you started— and it’s free!

Until next time love—

Mandi

Mastering Self-Doubt: The Path to Unshakable Trust in Yourself